10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Spirituality Information: Truth and Money

Defining what is true to you is not a finite spiritual axiom. Your spiritual growth allows you to change what is true to you as you experience different perspectives about life. The spirituality information that you believe as true one day can change the next day because of your experience. Your truths can only come from your experience.

All too often we discount the truth of our experience and simply accept the words of others as our own truth. Even though our experience tells us one thing we sometimes hear what other people tell us about a certain topic and believe what they tell us because they are somehow in a position of authority. We grant them a position of authority because our societal conditioning says that is what we are supposed to do. Is that your truth?

Authority figures in our society typically are recognized because of some external trait such as being rich or being the boss or an institutional title, such as a teacher or principle, or a religious leader or government official.

Let me give you an example. We hold in our value system in this country of the United States of America, as well as most of the countries of the world, that we have the right of free speech. Free speech is inherent to our system of democracy and it is one of the cornerstones of our constitution. We believe, and we hold as truth, that each and every citizen is free to speak their own truths as a demonstration that all voices and opinions have value and contribute to our overall freedom and democracy. When we define free speech within our own parameters, most of us would say that we are free to speak and write whatever we choose. That is our belief. Human beings speak and write our strongly held opinions. When we think of money, we don't usually ascribe the characteristic to money that it has the ability to speak or write. Money is an inanimate object that is used as a medium of exchange for value rendered. We know from our own experience that money, as an object, and our own opinions, expressed in form through our speech, are two entirely different concepts. That is our experience. That is what we know to be true. (Unless you don't). That is what we claim democracy is all about. Each person in the democracy has equal voice as to how the democracy is run and ultimately how it affects each and every life in the democracy. The Supreme Court of the United States of America has told us that money is the same as free speech. We have been told that the dollar bill you take out of your wallet, or the ten thousand dollar check that is written out to the politician of your choice, has the same value as your written or spoken word. Do you believe that? It is a law of the land. It has been told to us that this is true. Is that your experience of money? Is it your experience that a piece of paper with some pictures and writing on it has the same value as the words that you express that come from your innermost thoughts and aspirations? It is entirely your choice whether you believe this to be true or not. Everything that we choose to believe or not believe is a choice. The question we must ask ourselves is, Are we making our choices consciously or unconsciously?The second question we must ask is, Does this serve me? Are we making conscious decisions that affect our lives, or are we accepting the word of others as our own truths and conditioning ourselves to accept our unconscious choices that affect every facet of our lives? We have been told that money has the same voice and value, perhaps more, than your own personal opinion. These are words that we are told. Our experience is something different than that. Which is true? That is up to you to decide. Is your own experience of money and speech the truth, or are the words of the Justices of the Supreme Court true? Here is the kicker question: What serves me? Does it serve me to believe that money is speech? Does it serve me to believe that money is not speech? Only you can answer those questions for yourself.

About the Author

Richard Blackstone is an author and international speaker on Life, Love and The True Nature of How Things Work. He won the prestigious "America's Next Top Author" award from ConsciousOne.com for his book, "Nuts & Bolts Spirituality." Read his FREE report, "The 3 Simple Immutable Laws of the Universe" at: http://www.NutsandBoltsSpirituality.com


Anonymous said...

Have you never heard that "money talks?"

And didn't Jesus say you couldn't worship both God and money? God talks, so I guess money talks too. Ne c'est pas?

Samuel said...

Truth and Money? Do they have anything in common? Yes, truth and money they are energies. Everything is energy whether is love, truth, money, the Sun, flower, stone. It does not really matter whether what you believe in, what is your dream, your truth… There are 6 billions people on our Earth- we are all differ, we are all have our own individuality, we are all have our own truth and only beyond our minds, our conditions, our brain limits there is an Absolute Truth. This is our mission- to open our individuality to the world, to develop it.
In fact the saying “money talks” does really work. As there is a system of our society, but if you look inside you and be honest with yourself- you will find, know and may be feel this Absolute Truth.
Jesus Christ said what he said. He did not mean that money is evil, he pointed us not to miss the right way and not to turn money as mean of achieving this or that good into the goal of the whole our life, concentrating on MAKING AND EARNING MONEY.
Be yourself- and your heart will talk, not money. Nothing material you take from this Earth when you are passing away, just your soul experience. This is the thing that can tell you where the truth is.