10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice
Filed under: personal, self improvement, spiritual life, spirituality, succes Author:
I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.
There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.
2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.
3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.
4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”
Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:- 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.
- 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.
- 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.
- 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.
- 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.
- 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.
- 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.
- 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.
- 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”
- 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!
 










Heidi Hess Saxton
March 19, 2008 at 7:19 AM
Anger is a very common (but little talked about) reaction to the stresses of motherhood. I blog about it on my adoption blog "Mommy Monsters" and in my book "Raising Up Mommy." Stop by and see me sometime!
Alice Hobbs
March 19, 2008 at 8:03 AM
You are absolutely right, anger is a feeling that we come across every day. As for the motherhood anger or child one – is a really huge topic to discuss. Even Plato said that the most uncontrolled wild animals are our little children. Let them express their feelings whether it is love or hate, anger or calmness, as they do not impulsive and not on purpose. Very often they copy adult’s behavior – so this is the high time to analyze your own behave. How do you control your anger. Only if you forbid your children anything to do, do it consecutively and consistently.
Terrah Dawn
March 19, 2008 at 10:45 PM
As far as anger in adults, I get angry and let it out. I don't like things building up inside me - the end result of holding it in can be terrible. Some explode in violence. I feel it's better to let it out than to let it build up.
Strange, I know adults that will get mad at someone because the other adult is mad. Instead of understanding why the other is angry and trying to calm them - they get mad... that makes things worse not better - but they don't realize it.
I see nothing wrong with someone becoming angry over something - but it's when they throw things, hit others etc... that's a big problem.
We all get angry and we all need to let it out [screaming is enough]. But then to get out of the anger the steps you've posted here DO help.
Right now I'm angry over some things.... I've released it. Now trying to figure out how to fix the problems LOL.
Great post thanks!
Alice Hobbs
March 21, 2008 at 3:11 AM
You are absolutely right that is better to express your anger rather than restrain it. Sure, we have a huge range of feelings and we are free to express them. The issue of the day –is how to control this anger. As you understand that someone thinks that screaming is enough to express his anger, another one thinks that throwing things is a normal way to express his anger. We all are very different. And the main question is– the limits, the extension of this anger expression as everybody has his own measure. People’s brains, emotional sphere and consequently their psychic setup are very mysterious phenomena; it contains a lot of secrets, so you never know the reaction.
As for the anger causes anger, violence cause violence, love cause love- is absolutely true. So, let us do the good and share love in oder to receive the similar feedback.
Best regards, Alice
Anonymous
September 16, 2008 at 12:31 PM
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February 12, 2010 at 10:49 AM
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March 1, 2011 at 11:56 AM
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April 18, 2011 at 8:09 PM
David
June 16, 2011 at 4:40 AM
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June 28, 2011 at 12:01 AM
strawberrybubble
July 12, 2011 at 6:26 PM
satinder kaur
July 14, 2011 at 7:37 AM
arshad abrar jr
August 23, 2011 at 12:16 PM
Anonymous
September 2, 2011 at 10:08 PM
Thanks.
ajitesh baloria
November 22, 2011 at 6:20 AM
it happens to me all the time
till date i m suferin from this people dont like to talk to me i feel so lonely dont know wat to do..?
need advice ..................
Ajitesh Baloria
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November 23, 2011 at 10:38 AM
D
November 23, 2011 at 10:41 AM
saurav suman
December 11, 2011 at 10:58 AM