10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Wednesday, March 05, 2008

3 Steps to Your Happiness

The first step is to really look at what is going on in your life, what is working and what is not working. Take the time and give yourself a life review. Get a notebook and list the most important aspects of your life, such as health, finances, relationships and fun. Under each topic write what is working and what you want that is not there at the present time. Be honest with yourself. This simple life review takes you out of denial. When you continue to live in denial, you recreate the pains of the past. Over and over again, the same or very similar patterns show up in your life. As you follow this simple life review process, you begin to accept what is really going on in your life. Then you have a choice to change or correct the pattern. This conscious choice will begin to dissolve the old pattern and you actually are free to create a new experience for this part of your life.

Exercise: Take a moment and go inside your emotional body to a situation that caused the upset of this old pattern. Next accept how you feel when you think about this situation and pattern. Surrender the feeling and consciousness of this past experience. This takes you out of denial and begins the evolutionary path to the life you desire.

Second step is to claim the truth. When you stand and claim the truth, you put forth the truth into motion. This is energy in motion and is very powerful and will create a new life path. Jesus spoke in the Aramaic language which is a language of vibration that creates instant energy. The word Ameyn in Aramaic when used in the beginning of a statement means. I say unto you. This is the claiming process. You are sending a new vibration to the universe. The universe always give you what you are sending out or believe.

Exercise: Stand and claim the truth. Speak to the Universe by saying: I say unto you_____________fill in the blank with what you choose to experience. Repeat this statement over and over and you will continue to raise your frequency. This will allow you to continue to release more and more of the past and embrace a new vibration which is a new life of happiness and fulfillment.

Third and final step is to live the truth. Now that you have completed the two previous steps, this one will be easy and effortless. Because you proclaimed the truth, you are a new frequency and vibration, therefore,you will automatically have a different experience. More of your Sacred Self will be expressing through you into life. Living the truth is a demonstration of the higher frequency you claimed and broadcast to the universe.

Truth: Your actions reveal you intentions. As you follow these 3 steps, your intentions become very clear to the universe and they will be revealed effortlessly in your actions. You will have changed, evolved and will be happy with yourself and your life.

I am so excited to share this incredible and very simple way to your happiness and fulfillment.
For more exciting tips on how to live from the center of your being using your Sacred Energy to create a life of happiness and fulfillment go to http://www.VirginiaEllen.net. Virginia Ellen is an author and mystical teacher and healer who has devoted her life to serving the path of love and joy

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