10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Thursday, March 13, 2008

How to Consciously Choose the Life of Your Dreams

Everything in life is a choice and your spiritual growth depends entirely on the choices you make and the spirituality information that you immerse yourself in. The key to creating the life of your dreams is to begin the process of understanding how important it is to be conscious and aware of the choices you are making and whether those choices are serving you or not.

Relativity tells us that you can't know something as an experience until you first come to know its opposite. That is the purpose of the theory of relativity and all physical life. That is why we have this other beautiful, magnificent and glorious ability in our lives called choice. We get to choose whatever it is that we desire. We can say "the devil made me do it" all we want, but the ultimate reality is that we make a choice about every decision we make in our lives. Now comes the important question. Are you making your choices consciously or unconsciously? Really think about that one. Remember we are thinking up the life of your dreams here. Are you thinking consciously or unconsciously? Think about that, consciously. Right now you are reading this article. You are fully in the present moment. Your mind is engaged. Your brain is processing the data. You are in a conscious endeavor to improve your life. Right now you are thinking consciously, but what happens when you stop reading this article? Are you going to go over and turn on the idiot box and watch the next generation of a "reality show?" Are you going to mindlessly subject yourself to the commercials that tell you to go out and buy the next best version of the useless material possessions that already fill your cupboards and closets and your life? Is that what you call conscious living? Does that serve you? I'm not making judgments here; I am just making observations. It is entirely your choice as to what you fill your days and nights with. I just want you think about what you are thinking about because that is the only way that you can begin to think consciously. If we are saying that life is a process, and we are, then we want to be awake and aware of that process. You can only do that if you are conscious that life is a process and then consciously aware about how the process works. That's why you are reading this article. To understand the true nature of how things work. This is a conscious endeavor, which takes some concerted effort, but the rewards and riches that await you are worth the undertaking. We are not thinking about short-term gratification. We are going for the long haul, the big picture, the effortless life that awaits us when we wake up to this clarion call to consciously view life as a process. Telling ourselves that "the devil made me do it" isn't going to cut it anymore. You can only use that excuse when you are living unconsciously. Remember we are changing the way we are thinking and thinking different thoughts. Thank you Albert Einstein for telling us that you can't change your current situation by thinking the same thoughts that got you there. You must change the way you are thinking and think different thoughts.

Start the process of consciously being aware of your current situation and the begin to consciously make choices that open up different avenues of thought that have the potential to create the life of your grandest dreams and aspirations.

About the Author

Richard Blackstone is an author and international speaker on Life, Love and The True Nature of How Things Work. He won the prestigious "America's Next Top Author" award from ConsciousOne.com for his book, "Nuts & Bolts Spirituality." Read his FREE report, "The 3 Simple Immutable Laws of the Universe" at: http://www.NutsandBoltsSpirituality.com

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