10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

Popular content

Friday, August 22, 2008

Bilingual Monks at Shanghai Jade Buddha Temple Take on Role of Tour Guide

SHANGHAI : The Shanghai Jade Buddha Temple is a popular tourist destination in China. To cope with the influx of foreigners during the Olympic games, monks at the temple have been busy learning foreign languages.

Bilingual monks now have a new role in the temple. Besides chanting and praying, they also act as temple tour guides and ambassadors for the religion.

Ti Ting, a monk at the Shanghai Jade Buddha Temple, said: "Shanghai is an international city, a big city, and everyday (we have) many foreigners visiting our temple, so I think English is helpful for us..."

They started preparing for the tourist arrivals four years ago.

Yu Ping, another monk at the temple, said: "We know that China is hosting the Olympics from 8 August 2008, and Shanghai will be the site for the World Expo in 2010. Abbot Juexing has foresight and is open-minded, so he picked some monks from our temple to study at Shanghai International Studies University. This is also the first time that a secular university is cooperating with a temple."

Tourists visiting the temple during the Olympic season welcomed this initiative.

One tourist said: "I think it is very important because when tourists come, if we can actually hear about the monastery in the language we understand, then we feel we relate better to it, and especially if they live here, they can probably give us more information about their experiences than a tour guide."

Another added: "The monks can give us a better insight into Buddhism, especially Zen Buddhism, (compared to) a tour guide."

About 120 monks live at the monastery and plans are already underway to send the next batch of monks to the University to learn languages.

About 1,500 people visit the temple daily, and according to government statistics, there are now about 100 million Buddhists in the country.

Last year, China held its first World Buddhist Forum, signalling a revival of this religion.

And keeping up with changing appetites and development of the country, the temple also shows it is keeping up with progress. Monks at the temple offer visitors an understanding into the religion through better communication. - CNA/ms

By Channel NewsAsia's

No comments: