10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Monday, August 18, 2008

Illusion in your mirror and Slide - Show of your Reality

Due to the theory of transurfing our world represents a dual mirror. From the one side there is a usual to us reality, from the other one- boundless space of variants. Rich space of these variants is such an informational field that keeps safely all the scenarios of past, present and future, thus it knows what was, is and will be. Theoretically you may perform any scenario into life you like.
A human being charmed by this mirror thinks that reflection in this very mirror is the true reality. He looks in the mirror, but his life goes on the beaten track: no surprises, no stunning coincidences and no desperate flights. If amateur of illusions does not like anything in this mirror, he tries by all means to change the mirror. Why? There is one rule of transurfing: if you want to change the reflection - change its image. Do not ask, do not press for something, but create it.

Slides bring some distortions into reality. A bright example of it is "rose-coloured glasses". Through rose-coloured glasses life seems to be in sugar-well light. Perhaps you are familiar with the slide of "inferiority complex". Through these slides life seems to be angular, thorny and people around you always chuckle on your defects. Transurfing offers to replace negative slides to positive ones.
A positive slide is an imaginary and ideal picture of reached goal. It is rather better to replay this slide regularly and with pleasure in your consciousness. Step by step you will see that your scenario is putting into practice and your subconsciousness has constant positive emotions. You will see and feel this world in the light of these emotions. Don't be lazy to devote about 20 minutes a day to your positive slide. All efforts alongside with the aspiration and desire to act will bring you to the real miracle.
There is one interesting sort of slide. With the help of this slide you can make your piece of dual mirror comfortable and cosy. There is a set: "my world does take care of me". It is enough to remind to yourself several times a day this postulate and consequently dual mirror soon reflects a new reality designed by you. Thus you give a new quality to your world. Agree that is so nice to be always in a good mood and positive thinking. You can work on it and it becomes the second nature of you or your habit.


MrAdventure said...

I love it!

And yes, it does work. For much of my life I brought negativity with me through all things. Thus, negative things happened, including but not limited to war and alcoholism.

Now I try to maintain a positive aspect. Life is much better, brighter, and often funner.

I attempt to enjoy, to put joy into all dimensions of my life.

Alice Hobbs said...

Hi, my dear Mr Adventure!
Nice to hearing from you! Thank you for your response!

Yes, and I love it so much! Life is an adventure and we are creators of our life! Nobody for us will do it! Only we are responsible for our life whether it is good or bad. We are the dearest masterpieces of our life. There is one law of the universe: THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS!!! We are what we think about. The way we think – the thing we get. There is one more law: LAW OF ATTRACTION!!! So only we are in charge what to think, we are free to think- this is a gift from Lord. We think – and the universe just manifests it. We are all human beings, we all have negative thoughts. We have an opportunity to learn to think in a positive way. It is a work. But then is becomes a good habit and our life turns into a miracle as it is supposed to be from the very beginning. Welcome into Paradise of Positive Thinking!!!