10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Friday, August 15, 2008

Thinking of Spirituality

Step1: The Basis.

All things, as we currently know them, are the products of myriad Universal processes which have been at work for eons; much, much longer than mankind has existed on planet Earth.

That should tell us that each step along the way, each part of the process, each species, each experience is part of the overall process of Universal growth.

Step2: Before Mankind.

Until mankind's entry in the cycle of life on earth, all life was in complete subjection to the Universal Laws which had been governing and controlling the process for ages and ages.

Step3: Mankind's Entry.

When mankind entered the scene, he ultimately emerged (evolved?) with the capability of making personal and individual choices about how life was to be lived. With that capability came the power to question and even to resist the Universal Laws themselves.

As history has shown, mankind has not always chosen to keep, or even to acknowledge some of those Universal Laws.

Step4: The Irony.

The irony comes when we begin to understand that mankind may actually not be in as much control as he perceives himself to be. Universal Laws cannot be broken, else all things will end. Thus, our behavior (as resistant to some of that Law as it may be on the surface), cannot significantly disrupt the much grander processes at work carrying those Laws out.

Even if mankind succeeds in destroying himself, Universal Law will continue to govern, and will undoubtedly move ever so smoothly to the next necessary step in the process of growth.

Step5: The Paradox.

To think that mankind is the end-result of billions of years of growth is to think that God (our Creator, caretaker and the author of Universal Laws) is finished with His work on earth.

I, for one, don't think God is done yet; not until we've collectively reached that point of understanding...that level of spirituality where we all accept His will in our hearts, and have learned and demonstrated how to fulfill it.

Step6: The Conclusion.

When mankind finally learns to truly love one another and fully embrace peace and harmony and giving and forgiving and treating others as we'd like to be treated ourselves, I believe God will be pleased.

Until then, we'll keep stumbling, but maybe that's all part of the growing-pains!

May God bless and help us all!

By w1z111

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