10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Bhutan Exhibit Opens at Rubin Museum

NEW YORK—A selection of Bhutanese Buddhist art never before seen in the continental United States opened at the Rubin Museum of Art on west 17th St. on Friday, Sept. 19.

Bhutan is a predominantly Buddhist country and the only country to measure Gross National Happiness. In 2006, Business Week ranked Bhutan the happiest country in Asia.

The tiny Himalayan nation of Bhutan is one of the most isolated countries on Earth, having been spared colonization, invasion, and war.

“This exhibition is therefore a rare opportunity to explore an entire ethos untouched by the modern world,” said Martin Brauen, Rubin’s chief curator.

The exhibit, The Dragon’s Gift: The Sacred Arts of Bhutan, features hanging thangka tapestries and intricate statues of Buddhas, Boddhisattvas, and ferocious protector deities. Many pieces date back to the 16th century, when the Drugpa sect of Buddhism taught by Drugpa Kunleg became increasingly popular. The original founder of Buddhism, Buddha Shakyamuni, is not short of representation in the collection, either.

The collection was released by the Royal Government of Bhutan and prepared by the Honolulu Academy of the Arts, where it was on display before coming to New York. The exhibit will remain on view at the Rubin until January 5, 2009.

Monks blessed the objects in the new exhibition on Wed. Sept. 17 in a ritual chanting of scriptures followed by the pouring of water before the idols.

From Sept. 13 to 21, dancers wearing painted wooden masks with bulging eyes and a crown of skulls representing protector deities will perform chaam, a sacred ritual dance. The performances will take place in several public parks in the city.

Other events related to the exhibit include films, talks and crafts demonstrations. For full exhibition and activities schedule, please visit rmanyc.org/Bhutan.

By Christine Lin

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