10 ways to control your anger - Professional expert’s advice

I am really emotional and excitable person. I think that there are two types of anger: constructive anger and a destructive one. In order to understand the anger phenomenon I decided to investigate the nature of anger, reasons of its appearing, key factors and anger management.

What does it mean this anger? Anger is a strong indignation feeling of our emotional sphere that is attended by self-control losing. Anger is a signal of our state. Glands produce an array of hormones that have a great and deep effect on all our body. The main participants of this process are adrenaline and cortisol. They activate cardiovascular system and consequently all organs. Adrenalin causes fast heart beating, rising blood pressure. These rich oxygenated blood streams to the places are responsible for reaction. Thus some extra energy is released.

There are 4 basic ways of anger expressions:

1. Straight and immediately (verbally or nonverbally) to show your anger. It gives an opportunity to free from the negative emotions.

2. To express anger in an indirect way. In this case usually suffer persons that are weaker, not dangerous and those ones who “come to hand”, usually they are our family and close relatives. Thus we hurt our dear ones. One of the best ways is to express your anger to the person who is the source of this very anger. If it is impossible- better find some compromise.

3. Restraining anger you “drive” it deep inside. So, negative emotions store will provoke a big stress sooner or later.

4. You may foresee situation of anger feeling, try not to expand this feeling but get to know the reason, understand and solve it. A Roman philosopher Seneca said: “When you are feeling of ascending “volcano”- stand still, not doing anything- not speaking, not moving.”

Anger is a normal and natural human feeling, especially nowadays as life is really fast and we have a huge amount of information to accumulate (in comparison with our previous generations). The range of anger is rather wide: from a slight annoyance to impetuous fury. Anger can be quick and long, lasting for years in form of bitterness, vengeance or hate. Anger can lead to health issues like depression, high blood pressure, hearth diseases, stresses, alcohol dependence and obesity. If you are anger- express it. If you feel discomfort from these “negative splashes”- then we can give some techniques how to manage your emotional anger:

  • 1. Take a deep and continuous breath. Count up to 50 or imagine your aggressor just naked, only in socks. This will help you to calm and smile.

  • 2. Have a walk. Look at high sky. Continue to breathe deep and easily. So you appraise the situation and calm down.

  • 3. Do some physical exercises. When you are angry- your body is very tensed and tough. If you stretch your muscles it will relax your body, as you will spill out all your negative energy into action. Your brains will get more oxygen and it assists to clear your thoughts.

  • 4. Write down all your thoughts. Write down that you are mad and why. Avoid being rational, logical or laconic. Write on paper all you are feeling this moment. Try to write all in details. The function of this technique is to shift all your anger out of your head on paper.

  • 5. Be grateful. Find someone to thank. Do you not forget about yourself. Thank that you have woken up today, thank that that the Sun is shining for you, that the sky is blue and the grass is green.

  • 6. Prayer. Ask God to be with you during this anger moment and lead you.

  • 7. Meditation. Close your eyes, look into solar plexus, and be all your anger, breathing deeply.

  • 8. Change of places. Move yourself on your enemy’s place. And look at situation from his point of view. Better look at the situation from the ceiling. Focus on details, especially on funny and absurd ones. Strive to forgive your enemy as well as forgive truly yourself.

  • 9. Go back to your childhood memories. Recollect state when you were angry. Hug this child and say: “All is ok. I am here. You are good child. I love you and I will not leave you.”

  • 10. Your values. What is the most significant thing in your life? Who are the most important people in your life? What kind of person do you want to be? Think and accept that point that you are living your life, and you are living your values. There is a good man inside you that wants to help you. I wish you good luck!

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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

A Selection of Spiritual Journeys

From the tops of Machu Picchu, to the rose-red rock of Petra’s canyon-like Siq, to the divinely-inspired churches of northern Ethiopia, there are plenty of places on earth that inspire. If you’re looking for a holiday with a spiritual element, here are a few suggestions:

Korean retreat
Live like a monk at the Lotus Lantern International Meditation Centre. Located two hours from Seoul, this 12-year-old Buddhist temple was designed for foreigners looking to study the religious philosophy of Zen Buddhism. Visitors sleep on traditional Korean cots, wake up at the crack of dawn (3:45 a.m., to be exact), slip into itchy grey training suits, eat simple food, wash their own dishes and meditate many times a day.

Sun rise in Namibia
Bordering South Africa and Botswana, Namibia is where the Atlantic Ocean meets the desert, and where rich wildlife and traditional African culture meet some of the world’s most stunning sunrises. A popular tourist activity is climbing up Dune 45, one of Namibia’s many natural sand castles. The hike along the ridge isn’t easy, but it’s all worthwhile when you see the sun’s warm, orange light illuminate the 80-million-year-old Namib Desert.

Get enlightened in India
Rishikesh, a holy city in northern India, is a place many travellers go to find themselves. It’s a wildly popular spot on the banks of the Ganges River that draws Hindu pilgrims, new-age hippies, young Israeli backpackers and wise Babas who spend their days in the lotus position. Located some 200 kilometres from Delhi, this self-proclaimed yoga capital of the world is packed with meditation centres, ash­rams, Ayurvedic massage parlours, vegetarian rest­aurants and spiritual communities. With its nightly ceremonies along the river and vibe of collective spirituality, there’s something magical about Rishikesh.

Fountain of youth
For a look at the cradle of Incan civilization and a taste of her sacred waters, head to Isla del Sol on the shores of Bolivia’s sacred Lake Titicaca. On the south end of the island, walk up 200 steps to a sacred spring that’s said to be the fountain of youth. A sip of the water is not only refreshing, it’s an important part of Incan tradition. Lake Titicaca is also the highest navigable body of water in world — which means you may have difficulty differentiating between your own spiritual enlightenment and good old-fashion altitude sickness.

By Julia Dimon

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