By Mary Collins

Words that best describe me? Hungry Angry Lonely Tired. Those four words sum up all that goes through my mind day in and day out as a recovering alcoholic. I am hungry to explore the things I have missed during the 12 years I spent fighting alcohol, and am angry at the same time. I am lonesome as the pain is evident in those I hurt, and I'm so uninterested in feeling that way. Often it was like alcohol was the only real way to end the pain again, but I knew it wasn't the answer.

It had only been half a year since I decided I don't wanted alcohol in my life. The more time under the belt, the easier that it'll get. I am assured of that.

I recently made a decision to attend support groups twice per week. There are such a lot of great folks there who know exactly what I'm going thru. It looks that these are the nicest, most caring individuals I've ever met in my life, all who can relate to the Problems and the necessity to resort to alcohol any time difficulty finds its way. I also received a sponsor, who is always there, 24/7 when I need her. I feel so blessed.

It is hard when all of these feelings are tied up within you. It is only natural to want to resort back to what made you are feeling good. But I am too decrepid, and can't hide from the agony. You see where it has gotten me so far.

So now, I made the choice to seek out those around me for support, and it paid off. Fighting an obsession is an ongoing process that needs commitment and dedication, even years later. Thank the world that there are such great folk there to help. I couldn't have done it alone.

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